


Saeran Week 2018

by God217



Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: Saeran Week
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-05
Updated: 2018-06-05
Packaged: 2019-05-18 13:01:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 2,974
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14853252
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/God217/pseuds/God217
Summary: A whole week dedicated to the world's most precious boy ♡





	1. Seasons

Saeran once asked her which her favorite season is. It was a casual question it seemed, nothing but vague interest. They talked about a lot of random things, and it was no surprise he'd want to know.

Yet, something about the subject felt different, as if there were an underlying meaning hidden in it.

It took her a bit to answer him, as she tried to think of what she could say that seemed right to them both.

Which season is the best?

◦❁◦

Winter is cold and harsh, the temperatures dropping so low they kill almost all flowers. Animals hibernate or flee to the south, and the whole world looks dead, empty and white.

But there are lots of things to be done in the snow. Going sledding or just taking a walk, wearing cozy sweaters and jackets and gloves. Sharing hot chocolate in front of a warm fire, or going ice skating on a lake.

Spring is a new beginning, the time where the snow melts away and everything begins to bloom. The birds return to sing their songs, filling the air with sweet tunes.

The world is green and bright, and though it rains often, it's a fresh kind of rain. A nurturing one.

In summer, the sun shines brightly every day, causing the air to get so hot it seems as if it were flimmering. It's the season for ice cream and swimming, but also for sweating abd being too warm to even move.

Then finally autumn, when the world gets ready for winter once again. Trees turning colorful and wondrous for one last time before shedding their leaves, and animals preparing for their journey or their naps.

Rains return, bringing cold winds and soggy grounds, but on dry days, there's nothing like wearing sweaters and going on a walk.

◦❁◦

She told him that all four seasons are unique and different, all seasons have their good and their bad sides.

And that she thinks that there is none that can be deemed as better than the others, and none that can be called more important.

Because the world needs all four seasons to exist, they're all equally valuable parts of life.

And all four seasons are beautiful.

And she loves all of them the same.

Just like him, really.

He has different sides, different parts of him, that are unlike each other. Yet he is the same no matter how different he is.

No matter what happens, it'll always be him.

He'll always love her.

And she'll love him the same.


	2. School Life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In the diary Saeran actually mentions "church friends" at some point and like. I love that. He actually had friends there nobody can take this from me.

Unlike most children, Saeran loved going to school more than anything. It was only church school, but it was the only one he’d ever known.

It was the only place where mother couldn’t hurt him.

He still wished for Saeyoung to return, every single day he prayed for him. But at least he got  to go to school.

V and Rika picked him up at home every day, gave him food, played with him. And he got to learn so many things!

They even let him be in charge of the church garden, and there was nothing he looked forward to as much as seeing the flowers grow every day.

He had friends at church school too.

The first friends he’d ever made, no, the first children he’d ever met aside from himself and Saeyoung.

Going to school was great. At least for a few hours every day, he got to feel almost like a normal child, the way he supposed they felt all the time. He got to just have fun, without having to be afraid of getting scolded like mother would.

The teacher never scolded him. He was really nice, just like V and Rika.

Maybe he could ask them to adopt him so he could live with them instead. But if he did that, Saeyoung might not know where he was when he returned.

No, he had to stay with mother until his brother came home. Otherwise he wouldn’t be able to find him, and then he’d be sad because he’d think Saeran had left without him.

He’d never leave without Saeyoung. He could wait until he came home, he’d surely come soon.

But he could go to school.

After all, Saeyoung had gone to this church too, so he could find him here. And Saeran loved discovering things his twin had told him about before, like the huge picture at the back of the classroom or the tree with the names in the bark in the garden.

At the end of every day, he knew he always had to go home, and he knew mother would be waiting to chain him up again. He knew he’d have to sleep on the dirty floor with his foot uncomfortably chained to the wall, no food or water for him, not even a pillow.

But it was okay.

Because now he could at least look forward to going to school again, he could go to church just like Saeyoung had.

Maybe if he learned how to pray right then god would let Saeyoung come back.

He’d keep practicing until he was good enough, even if it took him forever.

Sometimes when Saeran was at church school, surrounded by the flowers he was tending and his new friends, he was almost happy.

Not that he was actually allowed to be happy, of course.

But nobody had said anything about almost.

Almost was good enough for him.


	3. Memories

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I can't write happy things I'm sorry

Memories are haunting him.

They’re bittersweet, painful.

His whole life is filled with pain, but it’s not the memories of his suffering that hurt him the most. Those he can deal with. He’s used to them.

The ones that hurt are the good ones.

The ones of Saeyoung.

Back when they were children, when they were still together.

Their lives were hard, sure, but they had each other. They weren’t alone.

Saeyoung was always there for him, he’d promised he always would be.

Liar.

He’d left him just like anybody else. He’d probably never even liked him.

Of course he wouldn’t.

He was weak.

Nothing but a burden, an airhead.

Useless.

But he’d thought Saeyoung would still love him, he’d actually been foolish enough to believe it.

He’s nothing but a traitor.

He remembers all those times mother wouldn’t let him eat, when Saeyoung would sneak him bread or some candy.

He can’t even stand the taste of bread now, all it gives him are nightmares, all it does is make him sick.

He’d rather never eat again.

Whenever a storm hits, he’s reminded of those times he’d been afraid of the thunder, of the wind blowing through the cracked window, rattling the entire house. Saeyoung had crawled next to him and held him all night so he wouldn’t be afraid.

He’s not afraid anymore.

But every time there’s a storm he’s reminded that he’s alone now, the way he was always meant to be.

He and Saeyoung used to share everything, every memory he has is theirs together.

And now everything reminds him of him.

Everything reminds him of the abandonment.

Betrayal.

They used to sneak out together and eat ice cream, watch the sky.

Saeyoung used to tell him stories about the world outside, about church. He’d bring him little gifts sometimes too.

He’d protected him from mother, or at least try to.

On Christmas, they’d watched the fireworks through their window, standing side by side.

Every day since they were born, the two of them had been together, and they’d been meant to stay that way forever.

But Saeyoung had disappeared.

Now all Saeran has left are the memories that tear apart his mind.


	4. Weddings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Featuring my OC Nabi, based off a rp between md and my best friend.   
> Post prologue bad ending and post escaping Mint Eye

Neither of them really knows how they ended up there.

Really, if anyone asked, they wouldn’t be able to explain it.

It just kind of happened.

It’s funny, really.

Every time someone asks them how they’ve met, all they do I look at each other and burst out laughing.

Nobody would actually believe them if they told them the truth, they’d all think it was a joke.

It’s not.

Back two years or so ago, they met because he kidnapped her.

Which isn’t exactly the most romantic thing one can do, but apparently, it worked.

There’s just something about escaping from a crazy cult that really bonds two people together.

Maybe it’s the joint therapy sessions too, few things are as deep a trust exercise as sharing a therapist.

It might just be the mutual death wish.

Either way, now they’re both standing in front of the altar, and as crazy as their pasts might be, their future is going to be brighter.

As long as they have each other, they’re going to be okay. Both of them promised.

They’ll stay together.

The rings around their fingers are proof of their words, proof of the bond their share, now and forever.

Saeran has been betrayed before, yet he’s allowed himself to believe that Nabi won’t ever leave him.

Nor will Saeyoung.

It’s still hard sometimes, it’s not like he can just let go of everything one day to another.

But he’s trying.

He wants to.

Looking at her, standing next to him and holding his hand, smiling at him, he knows that one day he will.

Both of them will.

He shakes his head at his brother giving him a thumbs up from the front row, and smiles back at her.

Both their lives have been crazy, and admittedly, not very bright.

And neither of them really knows how they ended up there.

But neither of them would want it any other way.


	5. Flowers

 “Flowers are his friends”.

She told him that, and he really likes the thought.

Flowers have always been nice to him.

He likes them better than people. Well, most people.

Sure, usually flowers are considered boring, because they don’t do much. But he doesn’t think so.

They grow!

And he loves watching them.

He loves knowing that he’s the one helping them grow big and pretty.

It feels like when he sees their bright colors, they’re blooming just for him.

It’s almost like they’re smiling at him.

As if they’re happy to see him.

They’re great listeners, too.

Of course he knows they can’t actually understand him, but he’s read somewhere that talking to flowers helps them grow, and he’s discovered that it’s pretty nice to have someone to talk to every now and then.

They can’t respond, but it’s still good to tell someone about his day.

It’s almost like having a friend.

A lot of friends.

And flowers won’t betray him, because at the end of the day, they’re just flowers, and they can’t possibly hurt him.

That’s another thing he likes about them.

Flowers don’t lie.

If he tends them well, they will grow and bloom for him, and eventually they will die because they’re flowers, but that’s okay.

They’ll grow back, or he can always plant new ones.

There are much more different kinds of flowers in the world than he could ever raise in his lifetime, and that’s a really intriguing thought to him.

With so many flowers, he’ll never truly be alone.

He’ll always be surrounded by countless beautiful colors of their soft petals, and by their sweet scent.

There’ll be butterflies, bees and other small critters that like the flowers too, as long as they don’t hurt them, maybe they can be his friends too.

He likes that better than being around people.

Flowers are always honest, he can trust them. He can study and understand them.

He’ll never be able to understand other people.

All they do is betray him and hurt him.

But flowers are his friends.

They’re the only friends he needs.


	6. Forgiveness

All those years, he’s thought he’d never be able to forgive his brother.

And now, he’s not even sure if there’s anything to forgive him for.

He can’t exactly ignore the hatred welling up every time he sees him, he can’t just forget all the thoughts and memories of betrayal.

But at the same time, he knows.

He knows that Saeyoung isn’t lying to him.

That he never meant to abandon him, and was trying to protect him all along.

That he actually thought he was safe.

He was never safe.

He was never happy.

And part of him still wants to blame his brother for that, but the other part understands that it wasn’t really his fault.

That they both made mistakes, but he’s never meant to hurt him.

And that it was Rika who betrayed him, not Saeyoung.

Rika, and also V.

They betrayed them both.

They separated them.

They lied.

Every time he as much as just sees his brother’s name, or hears his voice, his first reaction is hatred, rage, and anxiety.

It’s the reaction he was taught to have.

But he knows that he’s wrong.

And he’s trying to pretend it’s not there, because now that he knows Saeyoung never betrayed him, he hates himself for still not being able to get his body to understand.

His mind knows, but his body doesn’t.

He doesn’t want to hate his brother anymore.

He doesn’t want to hurt him, and he knows he’s hurting him, even if he refuses to show it.

They’re twins. He can tell.

He wants to forgive Saeyoung, but it’s not that easy, because there’s nothing to forgive in the first place.

There never was.

So now he just doesn’t know what to do.

All he knows is that he’s sorry.


	7. Birthday

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Happy Birthday to my favorite boys!! I love them both so much ♡

Birthdays never held much importance to him.

He almost never even found out when his birthday was. Really, it wasn’t until he was probably five years old when he first heard that such a thing as a birthday existed!

And that he, too, had one.

At first he’d genuinely assumed birthdays were only for the nice kids, for those who weren’t born wrong. It was mere coincidence Saeyoung had picked something up on one of his errand runs, and mere luck that mother had been sober enough that day to actually answer their questions, and tell them the date.

Not that she’d been willing to celebrate with them.

But just knowing that they actually had a special day just for them was more than enough.

Neither of them ever received presents on their birthday, but they always made sure to spend the day together. After all, they were twins, two halves of the same. They shared everything, especially their birthday.

The day would’ve never meant that much to either of them if they hadn’t shared it.

◦❁◦

Later, Saeran had come to loathe the day.

All it did was remind him that it wasn’t all his, that there was another part of him out there.

A part that he wished he could just get rid of for good.

A part that did not want him.

His birthday reminded him of his brother, of the traitor that had left him to suffer, not even looking back.

If only it had been on any other day, maybe he could’ve liked it at least a tiny bit, despite not exactly feeling happy about having been born or whatever.

But just the thought of still being connected to Saeyoung, of still having something in common, it just brought back all the memories he wished to forget.

It brought back the hatred shielding him from the pain.

◦❁◦

For Saeyoung on the other hand, his birthdays were as bad as Christmas.

He’d always promised Saeran that that day would be their very own, that it was theirs to keep, and that one day, they’d celebrate it together for real.

But he’d broken that promise.

And every year on that day, all he could think of was his brother, sitting somewhere without him, having to celebrate on his own.

Of course, he told himself that he’d have friends around, other people that gave him presents and cake.

He told himself that surely Saeran would be happy, after all, he’d been promised that he was.

Still, he also knew that he was supposed to be by his side, sharing the day.

Instead he was who-knew-how-many miles away in a dark room, working all alone.

◦❁◦

Now, for the first time in their lives, their birthday might truly be good.

It’s their first birthday together again.

For real this time.

It’s not a birthday spent in a shabby, dim room, hungry and in pain.

It’s not a birthday spent alone at a computer.

It’s a birthday just the way it’s supposed to be, with cake and a party.

A small party of course, since Saeran wouldn’t appreciate crowds. It’s just them and the RFA, really.

Only their closest friends.

But that’s just the thing.

They have friends.

Friends who bought a giant cake, and decorated the whole house.

And friends who brought presents.

Saeran isn’t even sure what exactly he’s supposed to do with the wrapped box he’s handed at first. It can’t possibly be for him, right?

And when he eventually tries to unwrap it, he’s so careful not to tear the paper, afraid of ruining the first ever present he’s got.

But the best thing aren’t the presents, or the cake, or the decorations.

The best thing aren’t the people with them, although they, too, mean more than he can say.

No, the best thing is his brother.

His brother that’s right next to him, sharing the day.

His brother who came back, who didn’t abandon him after all.

He’ll still need some time getting used to it, but he knows that he will.

He wants to.

Because now they’ll finally together, and now they can finally truly be happy about their special day.

Because now it’s truly special.

For the first time in their lives, they have a reason to celebrate now.

For the first time, it really feels like a birthday.


End file.
